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'One child at a time' / Ashland couple opens home and hearts to save eight little girls from Russia
Sunday, July 18, 1999
By Janet Caggiano
Photos by Lindy Keast Rodman
Times-Dispatch Staff
Every day is laundry day at the King household.
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| BRAVE NEW WORLD. Rebecca (right) and Rachael spent most of their days in a crib in their Russian orphanages. But since arriving in their new home last month, they've encountered new wonders, including Cheerios and Kleenex. |
Even on weekends, after nearly 25 loads have been washed, the machine chugs on. Its cycles continue come Monday morning.
"On Mondays, I sometimes do 12 loads," Meg King said. "It's really not so bad. Everyone helps out."
Well, almost everyone. The two newest family members are barely old enough to walk, much less sort, fold and stack clothes. But it won't be long before they join their siblings in the daily chore.
Rachael and Rebecca, both 14 months, were adopted by Meg King and her husband, Mike, last month from two different orphanages in Russia. The Kings have adopted six other girls, including identical twins and triplets, since 1993. The children, who range in age from 14 months to 8 years, are all from Russia.
"When we adopted the first, it was because we wanted children," Mr. King said. "We adopted the triplets because they were three little girls who needed a home. This time, we just feel that God has blessed us and has given us the resources, the heart and the energy to save two more children. We are doing this to save two girls from a hopeless future. That is very gratifying."
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| GROWING FAMILY. The King family includes: Molly, 7, Anna, 5, Mary, 7 (front row, left to right); triplets Christina, Victoria and Stacia, 8 (middle row); Meg, holding Rebecca, and Mike, holding Rachael. |
It's also tons of work. There're several sink fulls of dishes to wash every day, about $1,000 worth of groceries to buy each week, arguments to come between, scrapes to kiss and bandage, spills to mop up and hundreds of bedtime stories to read.
"The children are so important here, but they know they have responsibilities too," Mr. King said. "Other children may not have to do these things, like cleaning dishes and folding clothes, but with eight you have to have structure."
On top of all the daily chores that go hand in hand with raising such a large family is a little thing called school. Mrs. King left her job as a biology teacher at Atlee High School last year so she could home school the girls. Because five of the children are 11 months apart, she can teach them in groups for some core subjects like history, science and writing. She divides them up for reading and math.
"It might be easier to ship them off on a bus," she said. "But I feel they are very secure at home. I wanted them to have a sound phonetic reading program. They are learning well."
School starts promptly at 9 a.m. in the lower level of the King home in Ashland. The girls attend classes for part of the summer since the family takes a month-long break at Christmas. After school, Mrs. King and the children board one of two Suburbans and head to the pool for swimming lessons, the studio for ballet or the Costco store for supplies.
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| BIKER GIRLS. The triplets and twins learned to ride their bikes this spring without training wheels. |
"There are times of stress, disorder and chaos," said Mr. King, an agent for State Farm Insurance Agency. "Sometimes they all get excited and the noise level is so high. They all vie for attention. But I have grown to hate the silence."
. . .
Married in 1991, the Kings tried to have children of their own but could not. Two years later they traveled to Moldova, a former Soviet republic, with hopes of adopting.
"People told us there was an adoption program in place, but there was not," Mrs. King said. "We lost $8,000 and came home broken-hearted. People told us to let it go. We didn't. We kept at it."
They called World Child Inc., which finds homes for about 300 children a year from 13 countries. In November 1993, the Kings adopted twins, Molly and Mary, now 7. Still wanting an infant, they adopted 2-month-old Anna the following September.
The Kings felt their family was complete.
Then World Child phoned asking if they knew anyone who might be interested in adopting triplets. The Kings couldn't say no when the saw a photograph of the girls. They adopted Christina, Victoria and Stacia in May 1996.
"You certainly don't see this sort of thing very often," said Veronica Adams, supervisor of the Eastern Europe adoption program for Maryland-based World Child. "But I think they feel in their heart that this is what they were meant to do. These are special people."
With the triplets, though, came special circumstance. Since they were 5 years old when they were adopted, they were already speaking Russian. They knew no English. Husband and wife relied on sign language and a lot of pointing to communicate.
The triplets, now 8, enrolled in kindergarten a few months after arriving and were soon speaking English. It took a little longer for mother and father to tell them apart.
"I still mix them up," Mr. King said.
Over the next three years, the Kings, who are both 49, grew comfortable with their routine. They learned not to panic over every bruised knee or bloody lip. They lived through three broken arms -- two suffered by Anna from falls down the stairs and off the swing set -- and countless stitches. They began to cherish their life and the constant excitement that comes from parenting six young children.
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| LESSONS LEARNED. Meg King quit her job as a Hanover County teacher last year so she could teach her daughters at home. |
Then they got the urge to adopt again.
"We were reading about the tough conditions in Russia," Mrs. King said. "We began talking. We set out to adopt one more."
Just like before, when they adopted the triplets, the Kings couldn't say no. They returned home June 14 with two instead of one. Rebecca and Rachael, who are not related biologically, spent most of their days in Russia in a crib with little stimulation. They were listless their first few days in their new home. Now, their eyes sparkle and they giggle at the world around them.
"People tell us all the time that you can't save the world," Mrs. King said. "I believe you can if you save it one child at a time."
. . .
Because of stricter adoption policies, both mother and father had to travel to Russia this time. In years past, one made the trip so the other could stay home with the children. The new rule meant the Kings needed help. Relatives offered to keep one or two children, but the family did not want to be split up for three weeks.
Enter Gregory and Wanda Holden, who met the Kings at Sunday School about a year ago. They moved in to the Kings' home with their two teen-age daughters in May. They remained for 18 days.
"If someone were to ask me today who I admire the most, I would say it would have to be Meg King," Wanda Holden said. "I have walked in her shoes."
During her stay, Holden washed 82 loads of laundry. Along with other members of First Baptist Church in Ashland, she went grocery shopping, drove the girls to appointments and kept up with chores around the house.
"I would be lying if I didn't say things were hectic," Holden said. "But the joy of it all was incredible. The hardest part was having to leave."
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| HELPING HANDS. The King children are assigned chores around the house, but they often volunteer for other duties like helping Dad assemble a walker. |
First Baptist parishioners were not the only ones to help the Kings. Other local churches joined the cause. Volunteers raised about $6,000 for outreach programs in Russia and collected school supplies and other necessities for the Kings to bring to the villages there. Mrs. King taught in Russian schools as part of an exchange program in 1995, the year betweeen adopting Anna and the triplets.
"One reason we stuck with Russia was so all our children would have a common heritage," Mrs. King said. "We want them to appreciate the place they came from. We will continue to visit."
And they will teach their children about their heritage, about the life they left behind.
. . .
While most of the girls can't remember life in an orphanage, the triplets have strong memories because they were older.
"We slept in these tiny beds," Victoria said with a sly smile. "Our beds now are so huge. We couldn't climb up because they were too big. Mommy and Daddy had to help us up."
The triplets cried when they left Russia, petrified to board the plane.
"We had never seen a plane before," Victoria said. "We had never seen a lot of these things before. We were scared."
They were frightened of things their new parents never expected, from the car that carried them from the airport to the blinds hanging in their new home.
"At first, we didn't want to come," Christina said. "Now, we like it. I like it very much because I have a mommy and a daddy. And one more thing. We get a better life."
. . .
The inquisitive looks have increased. The comments are nonstop.
"People will ask, 'Are all these children really yours?'" Mr. King said. "They say we are crazy. I don't think we are crazy. We are blessed."
Even at church, people who don't know the family will stare as they enter.
"It looks like mom and pop with their ducklings behind them," said the Rev. Robert E. Thompson, pastor at First Baptist. "You should see the looks on some of the faces as they try to figure it all out."
Thompson enjoys telling those who ask that all eight children do indeed belong to one couple.
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| A MOTHER'S TOUCH. After 14-month-old Rebecca bumped her chin on the floor, she received plenty of comfort from mother, Meg King, and sisters Stacia (left) and Victoria. |
"Their hearts are geared for this," Thompson said. "Sometimes, God unfolds for us what we are supposed to do in life. I think this is part of their calling. I think if they could have brought all those children home, they would have."
According to World Child, more than 300,000 children live in orphanages in Russia. But the process to adopt is not an easy one.
There's an extensive home study that includes, among other things, an investigation into the couple's employment history, medical records, criminal background and credit record. Both parents must travel to Russia where they appear in court for approval. They must acquire entry visas for the children, new birth certificates and medical reports. The paperwork usually takes two weeks.
Then it's back on a plane for the 12-hour flight home. The process costs from $10,000 to $25,000 per child.
"Adoption is not for the faint of heart," Mrs. King said. "We might be veterans now, but it's still a grueling trip."
While they plan to return to Russia for more missionary projects and to show the children their homeland, the Kings have no plans to adopt again. Eight, they say, is enough.
"It can be difficult sometimes," Mr. King said. "You have to be willing to put eight other people ahead of yourself. That is not always easy. It's hard to have our alone time."
Husband and wife no longer take Hawaiian vacations. Mrs. King gave up her 21-year teaching career to take on home schooling. Mr. King said goodbye to flying planes.
"These children are more important than any of those things," he said. "Some people just don't understand that."
So the Kings try to explain. They tell anyone who will listen about their experiences adopting and the importance of saving children from an empty future.
"These children may not have come from my body, but they came from my heart," Mrs. King said. "I can't imagine anything better."
© 1999, Richmond Newspapers Inc.
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